Welcome back Travellers,
This little train of thought is brought to you by my local laundromat. I’ve been going to the nearest one this past week due to my washing machine being on the blink. I’m currently waiting on the part that’s been ordered to repair it. It feels like it’s taking forever…which is how everything feels that’s inconvenient to us, isn’t it?
Have you seen the movie Constantine? Or read the comic, think there was a short lived TV show as well? For those that say not, a brief character sketch: John Constantine is a man who was blessed/cursed with the power to see the demons amoung us. He was born with this “gift”. He then spends his life trapping/killing demons to send them back to hell. Hell is also where he is destined to go because of his suicide attempt. That attempt gave him these powers. And there’s an awesome tattoo on his forearms…(this is the movie version character, which is a departure from the comic, Hell blazer, which I have not read, so forgive my blasphemy…)
If I missed anything to those that are familiar, let me know…
I mention him because I’ve always felt that laundromats, certain parts of hospitals, or nursing homes or grocery stores in the middle of the night feel abit like temporary portals to hell. Or at least how I imagine such a place would present itself here on earth. I say this only because there is a strange feeling of nothing in them. Like a soulless vacuum if you will…
Somewhere between the fluorescent lighting, the humming of the fans, the starkness of the decor, and just well, a disturbance in the force if you will. Actually more of an absence of any life force. Maybe because all of these places are just transient in their nature, I dunno…but the other night when I was at this particular laundromat, I just kept thinking any moment John Constantine is going to show up and slay some sort of creature crawling out of the air ducts. Or maybe the strange smiling laundry attendant…Because I had the weirdest feeling being in there all alone.
Do you ever have that feeling?
Imagination is awesome isn’t it?
But more importantly, do you ever just feel your surroundings?
I know I sound like Yoda, but really, there is an energy field of sorts, isn’t there? The energy that exists all around us from the life that is all around us. I tend to think you can really get a good sense of this by going outside, seating yourself on the ground and just feel the life. The energy of the sun, the wind, the heat or the cold, the animals scurrying about speaking in their indiscernible chatter, the trees, the plants. All life has energy.
Go back into you home, and feel the space you reside in. Our emotional energy seems to fill up the rooms of our homes, along with any plants, pets, kids, all the appliances that are running. Candles burning, music playing. Energy. Everywhere.
I even think there is an exchange as you are reading what I am writing, because I am placing a part of my time and energy into this space, and you are giving your time and energy by reading it.
Somehow though, that laundromat feels like a dead zone. And as I mentioned before there are numerous other places that I’ve felt the same thing. I think it’s why people don’t fare well in hospitals for extended periods. Bad or lacking energy. Same with nursing homes, did you know that people normally do not survive more than 3 years in skilled nursing homes?
I should add here as a side note, I’m not a believer in heaven and hell, or at least not in the literal angels and demons stuff. If I were laying bets, I’m going with reincarnation with a side of karma OR it’s our final sleep. Either we die and come back or we go to sleep. That’s what I think at this point in my life and I’m okay with either option.
Which brings me to something I’ve also been contemplating lately and I’m not sure what exactly cultivated this train of thought but here we go, what is the actual life span of a human? As in, if we didn’t interfere, because we are, and then averaged out actual lifespan versus medically enhanced life span, where would we really be right now?
More than that though, what is the actual span of time that leads to a quality human life? And I know it’s very subjective because it seems we all have varying degrees of what we consider quality of life. Since I work with older people, and by that I mean many people over 80 and up to 104, and people with disabilities, I tend to wonder about quality of life. Almost everyday. And if we haven’t inadvertently created a society that now feels obligated to stay alive no matter how little enjoyment we may have left in our days. Technology makes it so we can, and now we feel we should…
I say all of this as your 40s are really the half way point in this journey and I’m here. I know I have made less common choices by working out for 5-6 days a week for the past 20 years, I never smoked, hardly drink, never did any recreational drugs, and have not experienced any life long diseases. BUT I am beginning to see signs of arthritis in my fingers and very very subtle changes that right now are of no impediment to my daily grind. BUT it’s coming.
Aging is happening. Since the day we were born, we have been aging. And I think we are so sold on the idea of preserving our outsides, when in fact, it’s what’s happening beneath our skin that we should be concerned with. Cellular regeneration. Are we still healing inside? To me that’s really where our lifestyle choices should be focused. Eating well, moving well, sleeping well, healing our minds/souls, and hydration. And I’m not sure the pharmaceuticals help with any of this most of the time.
And what about the strange relationship we have developed with our mortality? We are excising the powers of a God by intervening to save people’s lives. And creating lives, but yet we won’t let people leave the planet of their own choice without calling it a sin. We say euthanasia is interfering with God’s plan, why don’t we say the same about intervention that saves lives? And I’m not advocating for suicide under pressure, but it’s odd how if you contract cancer, you are almost obligated to utilize very unpleasant treatments to stay alive.
How long do any of us really want to live if there is no quality in our life?
That’s what I’ve been thinking about in the laundromat lately…